“Girls are getting bold. They don’t want to adjust at their in-laws’ place; Financial independence is spoiling them; look at the rising number of divorces these days; these girls are opting for separation as they cant adjust. This is just not a part of our culture,” I could hear one of my relative’s discussion yesterday where she was cribbing how her daughter-in-law was happy at her parents’ place and not at her ‘home’!
Now, there was another twist to this story. Her daughter-in-law was never respected at her place. Curses and verbal abuse were a daily part of her life which tormented her to such an extent that she left for her parent’s place.
This news spread like wide fire and the entire neighbourhood is after her life. Some blame her character, and some blame her upbringing, some blame her parents while the remaining blame her selfish nature.
Now don’t you think we are acting as hypocrites? The same female, who is again being disrespected, is saying NO to further atrocities and why is she being questioned now, is beyond anybody’s understanding.
Similarly, if a girl is into a relationship, and if she chooses to go out with her partner, then why is she being looked upon with raised eyebrows? The neighbours start getting inquisitive to know in-depth details and start weaving stories of her poor character the moment she is seen with her boyfriend.
Today, on Valentine’s Day, I have seen many females walking out with the love of their life; hand-in-hand, they are celebrating the day defined for love. Yet again, there are people who are criticising the act of these girls.
How can they walk around with a man of their choice so freely, is the basic question bouncing in their brains. Again their character is being questioned and they are declared as girls brought up with poor values.
Here we forget about Radha whom we worship daily, who was yet again into a relationship with Krishna, her Ras Leela with Krishna is something which fascinates us till today. Then why so contradiction with the females of today’s era? Our Hindu mythologies have proven the fact that woman did select self respect and preferred separation from her husband when she was disrespected for no fault of hers! If we go by Ramayana, Sita refused to go with Rama even when he requested!
Similarly, Radha preferred to remain in relationship while being free from the bond of marriage. Her love songs with Krishna still echo the bylanes of Vrindavan and Mathura. The tales of unwed mother, Kunti should also be mentioned in this context here.
Now, why being single comes up as a social stigma for females in India is a question which needs immediate attention! Why females are not allowed to live and earn on their own? Why their parents have to feel the plight when they either come back home post marriage or when they cross the certain marriageable age? Our mythologies speak high of strong female characters. However, in today’s times, despite education and awareness, the situation still remains pitiable and girls keep bearing the brunt of gender discrimination.
Single status for females does invite all the more attention from a her near and dear ones! Don’t you think it’s the high time when they should be respected for choosing self-respect and self-esteem to the daily abuses? Don’t you think they should be treated as role model for bringing up awareness among other female folks against the exploitation?
Isn’t this the time when they should make other females stand-up against this rising intolerance? If you too feel the pinch of their sufferings, then, let’s start giving space to them; let them live a life they want, let’s not make a fuss out of her trauma. She too deserves a respect and a better life; let her smile with open mind and pure heart.